Now that the Olympic flame has been doused by the tears of a thousand jade blossoms, its time for America's most athletically dexterous mutants to stash their red white and blue togs and head home. And the national spotlight turns to the political conventions featuring our most ethically dexterous mutants. We do cherish our little freak shows.

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The final results are in on this historic November day.  Despite the hundreds of millions of dollars he raised, Barack Obama has lost the 2008 presidential election.  American voters have boldly spoken truth to arrogance.  Turned out that all those pre-election opinion polls that showed Obama's inability to get over 50 percent support were prescient. 

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Not content to be viewed as your ordinary run- of- the mill hypocritical oaf, former Vice Presidential candidate John Edwards compounded his monumental weaseldom by trying to sneak an overdue admission of serial monogamy infractions under the cloak of the Beijing Olympics.

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By now, if you are not in the early stages of tertiary overdose from cloyingly mawkish Up Close and Personal previews emanating out of that quadrennial athletic meet going down in Beijing, you should consider yourself as lucky as a John McCain handler at a canceled photo op in a grocery store. As they say up in Maine, "the sap is running." I swear that if I hear the word "dream" uttered one more time, somebody at NBC is going to have chopsticks sticking out of parts of their body that chopsticks don't normally stick out of.

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Dear Mr. President:

I recently outlined my views on the Middle East in a major speech given the day after I proclaimed that I am without doubt the Democratic nominee for President. I delivered that speech to my primary constituents, the good fellows at AIPAC, on K Street where all the lobbies cluster. I’m writing to you not to reiterate some of the concerns and priorities I raised in that speech, points presented to AIPAC because I was forced to if I am to stay in this race, but rather to tell you what should be done if terrorism against America is to end.

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This seems like a good time to talk about the race for the vice presidency. Not because of the overwhelming excitement involved in what is essentially a backstage safari. And not because of the dazzling personalities being rigorously vetted. Because nothing else is going on. Right now, the Veepstakes is the only game in town.

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Finally? Yes, finally. Not a trick? No trick. Over? Yes. Over. It is once again safe for the faint of heart to come out from under the covers. The battle royale is done and the shrapnel has been kept to a minimum. At long last, the bedraggled Democrats have come to the blessed end of their perpetual primary pursuit. Not the beginning of the end.

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